Today’s khutbah is on the topic of gheebah or backbiting. It is one of the greatest sins and yet it is something we do day after day. The discussion shall revolve around addressing few questions like: What is meant by gheebah? How is gheebah defined? Why is gheebah so harmful? Why do people fall into the sin of gheebah? What are the exceptional circumstances under which gheebah is allowed? What should we do to avoid gheebah?
What is meant by gheebah?
Gheebah is derived from the three letter Arabic root غ ي ب (ghayn-ya-ba), meaning that which is unseen or absent. إغتابه orغَابَه means “He spoke evil of him in his absence, i.e. backbit him.” The Qur’an says,
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آَمَنُوا اجْتَنِبُوا كَثِيرًا مِنَ الظَّنِّ إِنَّ بَعْضَ الظَّنِّ إِثْمٌ وَلا تَجَسَّسُوا وَلا يَغْتَبْ بَعْضُكُمْ بَعْضًا أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَنْ يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ إِنَّ اللَّهَ تَوَّابٌ رَحِيمٌ
O you who believe, avoid much suspicion. Indeed some suspicion is a crime. And do not spy on one another and do not backbite one another. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? No, you would hate it. Fear God, God is ever forgiving and most merciful. (al-Hujurat 49:12).
The Prophet (SAW) was sitting with his companions one day and one of them was speaking badly about someone who wasn’t there. As the man got up to leave the Prophet (saw) said to him: “Pick Your Teeth!” “But I haven’t eaten anything,” the man protested. “No” the Prophet (SAW) said “You have eaten the flesh of your dead brother.”
How is gheebah defined?
Gheebah has been clearly defined by the Prophet (SAW) so that we can identify it and keep away from it. In a hadith reported in Sahih Muslim, Abu Huraira (R A) narrated that the Prophet (SAW) said, “Do you know what is backbiting?” They (the companions) said: “Allah and His Messenger know best. Thereupon the Prophet (SAW) said: “Backbiting implies your talking about your brother in a manner which he does not like.” It was said to him: “What if what I say about my brother is true?” He said: “If what you said about him is true then you would have backbitten him, and if it is not true, then you have slandered him.” Therefore, it is clear that the act of gheebah is to talk about a person in such a manner that he would dislike it if told on his face. It is one of the major sins in Islam.
Why is gheebah so harmful?
Backbiting is harmful because it is a clear violation of the sanctity of a Muslim and the sanctity of his honor. Backbiting is falling into that sacred area, and indulging into the Haram or the forbidden.
We can reflect upon just how much we lose every time we utter some bad words about another person. The Prophet (SAW) once asked his Companions: “Do you know who is bankrupt?” They replied: “The person among us who is bankrupt is the one who possesses neither money nor provision.” The Prophet (SAW) said: “The bankrupt of my ummah is he who comes on the Day of Resurrection with prayer, charity, and fasting to his credit. However, he had insulted this person, struck that person, and seized the wealth of another, on account of which his good deeds will be taken away from him. Then, if his good deeds are exhausted, the sins of those whom he wronged will be taken from them and foisted upon him and then he will be cast into the Fire.”
Brothers and sisters! We should know this Hadith, understand it and keep it mind in order to avoid being bankrupt and loser on the Day of Judgment.
Why do people fall into the sin of gheebah?
1. People fall into the sin of gheebah because they enjoy making fun of others, and belittling others. Do they not realize that they do not just taunt and defame their brothers and sisters, but in the process, they actually abuse, insult and offend Allah too? How? Mostly the gheebah they do has to do with the description of the person—with the parson’s features, color, disabilities, shortcomings, lack of money etc., for no fault of theirs. It is Allah (SWT) who gave the form to everyone and everything He created. It is He who gives wealth or holds wealth from whom He wishes. It is He who elevates some over others. Addressing the believers, Allah (SWT) says:
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آَمَنُوا لَا يَسْخَرْ قَومٌ مِنْ قَوْمٍ عَسَى أَنْ يَكُونُوا خَيْرًا مِنْهُمْ وَلَا نِسَاءٌ مِنْ نِسَاءٍ عَسَى أَنْ يَكُنَّ خَيْرًا مِنْهُنَّ وَلَا تَلْمِزُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ وَلَا تَنَابَزُوا بِالْأَلْقَابِ بِئْسَ الِاسْمُ الْفُسُوقُ بَعْدَ الْإِيمَانِ وَمَنْ لَمْ يَتُبْ فَأُولَئِكَ هُمُ الظَّالِمُونَ
O believers! Let no men laugh at other men who may perhaps be better than themselves; and let no woman laugh at another woman, who may perhaps be better than herself. Do not defame through sarcastic remarks about one another, nor call one another by offensive nicknames. It is an evil thing to be called by a bad name after being a believer, and those who do not repent are the ones who are the wrongdoers. (Al Hujurat 49:11)
Another reason that people participate in backbiting is on account of the company they keep. They backbite people to please their peers and acquaintances. Allah says, conveying to us the words of the inhabitants of Hell:
وَكُنَّا نَخُوضُ مَعَ الْخَائِضِينَ
We used to gossip along with the gossipers (al-Muddathir, 74:45), i.e., we used to indulge in vain talk with those who entered into vain discourses.
Having Too Much Spare Time
This can cause a person to fall into backbiting, because it is easy for such an idle mind to become busy with men, their honor, and their faults. To correct this, a person must spend his time in acts of obedience to Allah, worshipping, seeking knowledge, and teaching others.
3. Another reason is conceit and lack of awareness of one’s faults. Such people should think about their own faults and try to correct themselves, and feel ashamed to criticize others when they have many faults themselves.
Another reason is hatred, enmity, and envy towards others. Ibn Taymiyyah says: “Some people are inspired by envy to backbite, and in doing so, combine two ignoble traits: backbiting and envy.”
Weakness of faith and impiety are also reasons which make a person speak thoughtlessly and carelessly and transgress against others when he speaks.
أَقُولُ قَوْلِي هَذَا وَأَسْتَغْفِرُ اللَّهَ لِي وَلَكُمْ وَلِسَائِرِ المُسْلِمينَ وَالمُسْلِمَاتْ فَاسْتَغْفِرُوهْ إِنَّهُ هُوَ الْغَفُورُ الرَّحِيمُ
الحمد لله رب العالمين والصلاة والسلام على سيد المرسلين وعلى آله وأصحابه أجمعين
What are the exceptional circumstances under which gheebah is allowed?
If the person is being oppressed. In this case you are allowed to talk about the person who oppresses so that the oppressed may take what is rightfully his. He should only talk out of necessity and only to the one who can assist the oppressed person in taking his right from the oppressor.
Requesting a fatwa (Islamic ruling). For example, you may say “my brother did such and such (recalling the event), what do I do?” It is permitted to recall the incident without mentioning the name of the person (this is better) so that a fatwa may be obtained.
When seeking marriage: If a man asked someone about a third person who has made a proposal for marriage, it is permitted for the one being asked to say what he knows about the one who has proposed. When talking about him (the one seeking marriage) the one who knows him should be honest about what he says, without diminishing the person’s value or exaggerating his faults.
Cautioning people about bad/evil-doers. If a person propagates something that is forbidden or evil, or something which contains shirk, it is permitted to warn people about that person.
If a person openly commits evil, such as seizing people’s wealth unlawfully, it is permissible to speak of what he is doing.
For identification, if someone is known by a nickname such as the dim-sighted one, or the blind man or the one-eyed or the lame one, it is permissible to identify him as such, but it is wrong to mention that by way of belittling him. If it is possible to identify him in some other way, that is better.
What should be done to stop ourselves from doing Gheebah?
We can protect ourselves from speaking ill of others by cultivating our fear of Allah and our sense of shame before of our Lord. This can be achieved by reflecting often upon the verses of the Quran and the hadith of our Prophet (SAW) that speak about Allah’s punishment, that encourage us to repent, and that warn us against evil deeds. Allah says:
أَمْ يَحْسَبُونَ أَنَّا لَا نَسْمَعُ سِرَّهُمْ وَنَجْوَاهُمْ بَلَى وَرُسُلُنَا لَدَيْهِمْ يَكْتُبُونَ
“Or do they think that We do not hear their secrets and their private counsels? Indeed we do and our messengers are by them to record.” [Surah al-Zukhruf: 80]
The Prophet (SAW) said: “Feel shame before Allah as you ought to feel shame before Him. So guard the head and what it contains, guard the stomach and what you put in it, and think upon death and returning to dust.” [Sunan al-Tirmidhî (2458)]
A beneficial remedy that can help us to rid ourselves of this evil habit is to reflect upon our own shortcomings and work to improve ourselves. If we preoccupy ourselves with our own faults, we will not find time to worry about the faults of others. We should fear that if we speak about someone else’s shortcomings, then Allah might punish us by afflicting us with the same.
Keeping the company of righteous people and avoiding bad company helps us to avoid backbiting.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “The likeness of a good companion and a bad companion is that of a person carrying musk and another who works the bellows. The person carrying musk might give you some of it or at the very least you will enjoy the pleasant scent. The person with the bellows will either burn your clothing or at least make you suffer from the bad smell.”
A person who has a habit of backbiting others needs to make a firm and determined resolution to stop because as was mentioned earlier, it is one of the greatest sins and yet it is something we do day after day.
Let me remind you and myself first that one of the easiest ways to lose one’s hasanat (i.e. one’s good deeds) without realizing it is to backbite someone.
Let me conclude with an ayah of the Qur’an and a beautiful saying of our beloved Prophet (SAW), which if followed will ensure the protection of our tongue. Allah says in Surat Qaf,
مَا يَلْفِظُ مِنْ قَوْلٍ إِلاَّ لَدَيْهِ رَقِيبٌ عَتِيدٌ
“Not a single word is uttered by one but there is a watcher near him, ready (to record)” (Qaf, 50:18).
And according to a hadith, “Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day let him either speak good or keep silent.”
We seek Allah’s forgiveness from the sin of gheebah and we seek His tawfiq to take out the sin of gheebah from our lives.
